Worried you’re annoying on Facebook? Check out the 7 most useless (and in my opinion, most annoying) Facebook statuses you can post!
A great way to make sure you’re not posting a pointless status is to ask yourself, “Is there a function for my status?”.
Your status should either be spreading information (ex: raising awareness), narrating a funny anecdote, or even asking for help.
What shouldn’t your status be? Check out here:
1. The Ambiguous Status
Example: “Ugh.”; “Worst day of me life.”; “Yayayayayayay ”
The ambiguous status is the one that reveals nothing and therefore, is pointless!
If you don’t plan on explaining why your day sucked or why it’s the best day EVERRRRRR, then don’t bother sharing it!
2. The Hacked Status
Example: “I pee in my pants every night.”
The hacked status is the one that you know a dorm mate or friend typed while your friend was away from their computer in an attempt to be “funny.”
First time? Ha-ha. Second time? Hmph. Third time forward? Get new friends or learn to password protect your lap top!
3. The Rant
While your status is a place to share your views, your views best not take up more than 3 sentences.
Nobody wants a half page rant pop up on their feed about why you feel you deserved two fortune cookies from your local Chinese take-out joint as opposed to one.
The worst? Repeat ranters. These are the ones who have an issue with the world or someone every single week (or every day in some cases).
SHUT UP! Save your feelings for your therapist and/or best friend.
4. The Itinerary
Example: “Shower then driving to the grocery store then class and then pizza for dinner!”
Nobody cares what your day is like—and if they do, they might be a wee bit creepy—so it’s really annoying to see a play by play of your past or upcoming day.
Sure, if you’re going to be meeting President Obama for lunch or you’re meeting Megan Fox, we wanna know!
But if your itinerary involves day-to-day activities such as “showering” and “eating” than chances are nobody gives a shit!
5. The Compliment-Fishing Status/Pity-Inducing Status
Example: “Ughhhh I’m so ugly ”
If you’re trying to seek compliments and/or pity from your status, then DON’T!
While this may work the first time, it gets old FAST! Nobody wants to have to type out why you’re not morbidly obese, or try to comfort why you won’t be a spinster for the rest of your life.
6. The Copied and Pasted Lyrics
Example: “Your love is my drug <3″
We all know lyrics to songs and we don’t need you to aimlessly copy and paste verses as a status update. What’s the point? Do you hate that verse? Do you like it? Is it significant? Do you not comprehend it?
7. The Chain Status
Example: “Click this link and like this page to see your profile turn blue! OMG so amazing.”
The Chain status has no function, is annoying, stupid, and makes you seem foolish. Most of them don’t work and are meaningless ways for a page to get more likes.