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Let’s be honest, we have all survived break-ups. In fact, if you haven’t gone through a true break-up than you, then you haven’t lived.
Breaking up with someone is part of the human process.
When it comes to a true and genuine break -up, it affects you in a gut-wrenching, soul-shattering, and profoundly coma-induced way.
It affects you so much that there are some days when you can’t even think about getting out of bed. I know, because I have gone through a few minor ones and one major one in my lifetime. The major one forced me into this coma-induced seclusion. I didn’t escape from it for many years. During those years I spent my time going after all of the unavailable men to fill the void.
It didn’t work.
I hope you can relate to some of this.
When you spend your whole life living and breathing that special person and than he or she moves on (without you) it takes its toll on you in a major way!
Break up advice and rules:
Have a support system
Well the most important thing is to have a support system around you. Find comfort in friends and even family, but only those who will work to keep you motivated and positive. Motivated and positive to work through the feelings in a healthy way and than move forward. Now, of course there are some that will tell you that alcohol is a good way to cope, but to be honest, I would not get into this habit. If you do, you are creating a whole new set of problems.
Don’t let it consume you
Don’t use shopping as way to cope either. Because this can be a negative outlet. Maxing out your credit cards or daddy’s credit can be an expensive coping mechanism. This can also lead to more trouble for you personally, which has nothing to do with the break-up.
Face your fears
What you need to do is work through the emotions on a positive level. Face the fears and take a look at yourself. Maybe ask yourself why the two of you broke up. Ask yourself if there was something that you did that caused him or her to leave. Or may be the break-up was out of your hands?
Think about yourself
Either way, take this time to focus on you. Work through the emotions. As a break-up rule you should not spend your time constantly thinking about the other person. This is unhealthy and it won’t help you to move on any faster.
Get rid of the past
If this is truly a break up and there is no hope of getting back together, do yourself this favor. Get rid of the pictures. Especially the pictures of him looking so good and you looking so happy.
This will only serve to bring you down further. It will also cause you to obsess about him even more. As you work through the emotions, get rid of any physical memories that will remind you of him (or her). By holding onto the pictures, clothing, CDs or movies you are holding onto the past.
Don’t accept any phone calls, emails or texts from him (or her). You need to block him (or her) out in a positive way. Face your feelings head on and work your ex out of your system in a healthy way. Try your best to stay away from your ex. If you do bump into him or her, than say hi and smile and move on. Don’t give the person a reason to hang around. If you do…it will make it that much harder.
When it comes to a successful break-up, you won’t be able to move on, while he (or she) is still there.
